Daddy Issues

Let's face it. Everyone who breathes has a different experience of daddy. Some have no experience at all. Some have or had an amazing father who showered them with love and attention. Some have more than one dad or two moms. Some are the results of rape, sex trafficing, drug addiction, or just plain bad parenting.

I happened to have a great dad. I was raised in a Charismatic Christian household, in a family of preachers. My dad was a preacher when I was very young, but had to give it up due to ongoing and serious health issues, but my uncles and many of my cousins carried on the family tradition (do you notice I do not mention any women in the family who were ministers? I only knew one, but in our faith, women only married into the ministry. They were not the main pastors.)

Despite giving up the pulpit, dad was a preacher in his soul. He passed in 2014 well into his eighties. The Angels had to practically drag him kicking and screaming to the other side. He loved being alive and successfully prayed away death many times over.

And then there was me.

Obviously, it was not smiled upon to chat with the dead or to do any sort of divination in our faith. However, dad never brought it up, and neither did I.

But now that he has passed, he loves coming through and chatting.

In my most recent gathering that I host once a month at my home and by Zoom, I led the group in a journey to make peace with those with whom there was unfinished business. This could be a living person or deceased. The intention was to create a safe space to say words that needed to be said but, for whatever reason, could not. I made mention of this in last week's blog post.

The intention of the meditation was to go to a safe space in the non-physical world, and say words that needed to be said to people who had made some sort of impact on our lives, but, for whatever reason, there were unsaid words. There was the necessity to either say or hear words of remorse, or regret, or even anger.

I led the group to the place where they were to meet up with the souls of people in their lives, and then I took my own journey.

And guess who showed up.

Daddy.

I was a little surprised, because I thought we resolved any issues we may have had. Mine revolved around guilt on his last days. My sister and I had to decide to let him pass or stay on life-support. I had to chat with him through my gift of telepathy since he was unable to communicate at the end and encourage him to go to the other side.

But that was not why he was there.

He said two words to me: Father's Blessings.

I remembered when he was alive he had said to me that he wanted to impart a father's blessing on his children. It was mentioned frequently in the Old Testament that the children would do rash and crazy things just to be the one to receive the father's blessing. One child got his father drunk and dressed up as his big brother so that his blind father would give him the blessing instead of his brother. It was really really important.

These days, we forget the importance of blessing our children. When we say blessings over our children, we impart to them a gift that is like no other. We speak words of life to them that give them power to live their lives in positive ways. There is nothing like telling your child that you are proud of them or that you believe in them.

It turns out that the majority of the attendees in my group did not have positive memories from their fathers. Their fathers did not impart a blessing on them. Rather, the children suffered years of pain as a result of the action or inaction of their fathers.

Obviously this also applies to father figures or mothers as well.

Remember that every word we speak is either a blessing or a curse.

Many times we forget that our children are not just the ones we give birth to or contribute DNA.

My dad reminded me that it was not just up to the fathers to impart the blessings on the children. He also reminded me that my children included my step-children and my grandchildren, and even my spiritual children as well. He reminded me it was important to speak blessings over them all and to pray or to speak well of them. In marriages where there are step-children, sometimes the role of the step-mom or step-dad is tricky and complicated. My role as step-mom is no exception.

Even from the grave my dad has a little preacher in him.

Sometimes we get caught up in drama and it is easy to gossip, complain, or write people off because of their life choices. if we are parents, it is easy to point out what we consider character flaws or even room for improvement in our children. It is important to train our children to make wise choices and it is even okay to voice concern when they don't and hold them accountable, but it is also important to honor them as a soul and bless them. Tell them they are wonderful and say words that empower and inspire them.

Yes, sometimes it is healthy to eliminate toxic people from your life. Sometimes we are forced to remove ourselves from family members or acquaintances who do not share our values or our lifestyle. Trust and respect is earned, not freely given, and if someone has not earned it, it is advisable to remove yourself from certain relationships. But release them with love and wish them well. Send them away with love and send them blessings on occasion. Who knows what impact your words of blessing will have on them?

If you need to heal from a parent who did not offer you a blessing or was in some way missing, dishonorable or flawed, remember that you are not flawed and you did not create their lack of positive presence. It is not your fault! Release them with love and reject any words or situations that wounded you.

If you were not the best parent or even the best child, you can make amends! Whether or not you have contact, look within yourself and resolve your issues. Take responsibility. Own your character flaws. Admit your failings. Apologize. You are not responsible for their reaction. Do your part. If you can't make amends in person, try the meditation where you contact their soul and have a conversation.

Let us bless one another and let go of the need to hold on to resentments and past failings. No, we do not have to let them back into our lives if their presence was toxic. But let go of the resentment. Determine to do better and be better.

Speak blessings to the people in your life who are important. Always hope for the best and believe the best for them. Wish them well. In doing so you are speaking blessings to them and assisting them in aligning with their highest good.

This does not mean that you overlook or allow bad behavior! I know sometimes there is a fine line between seeing and hoping for the best in your loved ones and giving them a free pass. Anytime I notice something in my loved ones that could use improvement, I also try to see something wonderful about them and point that out first!

When you speak a blessing to a loved one, you are empowering them and speaking life into their souls.

This is what it means to speak blessings to others. See their divinity so they can see it in themselves.

You are a divine soul living life in a human body. Life in the earth is hard and sometimes we all make mistakes. None of us have lived our lives without regret. If we have, then we are not seeing ourselves clearly.

Just for today, find someone and tell them one wonderful thing about themselves. And do that often.

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I so appreciate you!

Thank you for your interest in my weekly chats and I hope to connect with you soon!

I have written a couple of books you may find interesting!!

The story of my awakening and how I emerged into my current life as a psychic medium, shamanic healer and spiritual intuitive and my exploration of life in spirit world are both available on Amazon.

You can book a private session, see what events I have coming up, and check out my books

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Do one thing today that is good and kind and no one will ever find out about.